How To Behave With Those Who Insult You?

We often hear offensive words while standing in queues, in rush hour transport, at work, and even within the family. Offensive words can be very different - from simple jokes to expressions that cause rage. It is almost impossible to protect oneself from offensive words, we do not know when and from whom to expect a blow. There are several ways you can handle abuse without compromising your self-esteem.

How to protect yourself from abuse?

For example, one adult woman recalls how, in her youth, she stood in front of a mirror, looking at her reflection, and her mother walked by and said a very offensive phrase: "Don't worry about the shape of your nose, because one day you will be able to have an operation." Until that moment, this woman did not even think that she did not have a beautiful nose. Disguised insults are especially cruel when a person utters an offensive phrase and adds that he is saying this only for good. It turns out that you should treat the offender with understanding, while you feel disgusted by the words he said.

There are several ways you can handle the offence without losing your self-esteem.

1. Look at the abuser from the other angle. Often the person who offends others is filled with resentment himself and it does not necessarily concern you. For example, a saleswoman may get nasty to you not because she didn't like you, but because she recently broke up with her husband. The driver on the road may shout something offensive to you as a pedestrian, because he is rushing to the hospital to see his child. If you understand that you are not always the cause of other people's anger, then it will become easier to bear the resentment.
2. Analyze what you hear. If you hear something offensive, divide the sentence into parts and respond to the unspoken rebuke. For example, if a young man reproaches you that if you loved him, you would lose weight, ask him - how long ago did he decide that you stopped loving him?
3. Look the offender in the face and ask directly - why is he talking to you like that? This will help put the person in his place and make it clear that you do not intend to play the role of the victim.
4. Use humor. A good sense of humor can help you deal with any abuser. For example, if your friend noticed you have a new skirt and said that chairs are usually upholstered with such fabric, do not get lost and invite her to sit on your lap.
5. Use certain symbols and signs. One woman was constantly insulted by her husband in the presence of friends, in response to this she came up with a funny trick - there was always a small towel in her purse, and as soon as her husband said something offensive, the woman took out a towel and covered her head with it. The husband, of course, was ashamed in front of his friends, and he quickly got rid of the habit of hurting his wife.
6. Agree with everything. This will neutralize the critic. For example, if your husband tells you that you have gained ten kilograms, smile and say that you have gained twelve. If he continues to be indignant and asks you if you are going to lose weight, say no, because you have long wanted to have curvaceous forms.
7. Ignore what you hear. Turn a deaf ear, listen to criticism in silence and think that this does not concern you. Develop your ability to forgive. You can look at the offender without speaking. It is better to pretend that you are bored, for example, turn away or yawn, critics really do not like this attitude.

It is not always advisable to prove your case and constantly keep the defense. Take care of your nerves, forgive and forget about the bad. You know, once a man offended Buddha, and he asked him: “If someone refuses to accept a gift, who will it belong to? The man replied that to the one who gave it. The Buddha continued, "That's right, so I refuse to accept your offenses."

There are many people around who assert themselves by humiliating others. Do not pay attention to such people, do not accumulate grievances and live with a light heart.