How do you teach your child how to deal with emotions?
As a rule, we all take care of our children the way our parents did - we do everything so that they are fed, dressed, shod, receive good education, and so on. And although all this is very important, you should not limit yourself to this. We often forget how important it is to take care of the emotional needs of children, so that they can avoid many troubles in the future.
The fact that you have satisfied all the needs of the child on the physical level does not mean that you should neglect his emotions. Although emotional well-being depends on the material, it does not depend on it as much as we think.
A materially prosperous but emotionally neglected child may feel that something is wrong with him, but is often unable to express his feelings in words.
In addition, he sees that his parents, at first glance, care about him no less than the parents of his peers, and therefore drives his emotions into the depths of the subconscious, trying to pretend that nothing is happening to him. It is these emotions hidden in the subconscious that break out in the form of anger and rage sooner or later.
As parents, we must teach our children to manage their emotions and control them properly. This is not so difficult to do, but the knowledge acquired by our children will be useful to them throughout their lives.
1. Ask them how they feel regularly and subtly.
Tell your children that there is no shame in showing your feelings openly, especially in relationships with parents. Ask them to be direct about what they think and feel. Well, if it seems to you that something is bothering the child, it is better to ask about it than to face unexpected complications.
2. Let them know that there is nothing “shameful” or “wrong” about certain emotions.
Your children (and we ourselves) cannot force themselves to experience or not experience certain emotions. But if they think you have a negative attitude towards certain emotions, they may consider them "wrong" and try to suppress them in the hope of earning your approval. You should explain to them that there are no right or wrong emotions, that they are separate, independent individuals and have every right to feel any emotions.
3. Teach them to recognize emotions
It is important to teach your children to recognize the emotions they experience and to categorize them. When they are angry at something (or at someone), try to make them understand that what they feel is anger, and not something else. The more clearly they imagine exactly what they feel, the more opportunities they will have to express these feelings correctly.
4. Don't suppress their individuality
Encourage self-expression in your children. Do not try to fit them into some "correct" image that exists only in your head. If your daughter wants to wear red hair clips, don't argue with her and force her to wear green ones just because you think green suits her better. And if your son likes ballet more than boxing, don't force him to go to boxing just because "dancing is not a man's business."
5. When talking to them, use warm and emotional words
If you feel something about children, you should tell them about it. Make sure they are clear about exactly how you feel about them. They need to know what's going on in your mind - don't make them guess and figure it out for you.
6. Remind your children of the importance of a positive view of oneself
Remind your children regularly of the importance of encouraging themselves. They should know that when they are upset or sad about something, they should remind themselves that everything will be fine - sooner or later, one way or another. Positive encouragement of oneself contributes to motivation greatly.
7. Talk to them about uncomfortable emotions
Be prepared to talk to your children about things they find unpleasant or uncomfortable. Yes, no one likes to be sad, but no one can avoid this emotion. It's normal for them to feel sad, but they need to know that you won't leave them alone with it.
8. Let them express themselves through art and more
Allow children to express themselves the way they want. Make sure they have some sort of outlet through which they can express their emotions. It can be music, drawing, dancing, sports, and so on - the main thing is that they like it.
9. Talk to them about how to deal with their own emotions
Tell your children how you deal with your own emotions. Make sure they know how to express the emotions that are most often in their minds, explain to them how important this is. They should be aware that they should not "plug" their emotions inside.
10. Spend more time outdoors together
When you are with children in the fresh air, it helps relax both you and the children. Try to teach your children to visit nature regularly with those they care about. And although, at first glance, the impact of such a pastime is not so great, on a life-wide scale, it can work wonders.
11. Set a good emotional example, try not to overreact or lash out at the kids
Be a good example for your children. They react to how you behave and often change in an attempt to imitate you. By controlling your emotions, you help your children do the same.
12. Help children set clear boundaries for expressing emotions without devaluing them
Let your kids know that when it comes to emotions, it's usually best to think before you act. The fact that they feel bad does not mean that it is worth breaking loose and snapping at everyone present. Everything we do has its consequences, and they should not forget about it.
13. Make sure they are comfortable talking to you about their emotions and are not afraid of it
Always be ready to talk to your children about their feelings and let them know that they can reach out to you at any time of the day or night. They should feel safe in your company. They need to know that they will not be judged.
14. Help manage emotions with TV programs, books and familiar objects
Use familiar things to talk about emotions. For example, when children see something sad on TV on their favorite show, ask them how they feel about it. Help them connect their own feelings with the manifestations they are used to seeing regularly in books or on TV, without missing out on any of the most important ones.
14 things to teach kids to help them manage their emotions:
